She’s a crook.

So, I knew that we didn’t pay for the cable that we received at our home, but I never really took the time to think about where that wonderful free cable was coming from. And it didn’t occur to me that if we weren’t paying for it…that meant we were stealing it. Hey, I think cable, like Internet, should be free.

I consider not thinking too hard about fairly obvious things as one of the upsides to having a brain like mine. Yes, I might not be able to sleep at night because I’m busy obsessing over the best way to construct an Easter craft or build a terrarium…but I won’t blink twice when it comes to logistics or mechanics.

Apparently one of Eric’s old roommates, back from when our house was filled with stinky boys, had run some wires out to wherever the cable lines were, and we’ve been stealing from the cable company ever since. Lots of the guys who lived there used to install Dish Network, so they were familiar with all that jazz.

Anyway. I’m not a huge TV person. I can’t be, because I’m too easily entertained and too easily addicted to anything I set my mind to. But, I do like my Food Network and, as we all know I LOVE ME SOME America’s Next Top Model.

So I come home on Wednesday, thrilled that it’s time for ANTM, and I turn on the TV. But do I see Tyra and a slew of skinny little model-wannabes? NO! I only see blue. I looked behind the TV and turned it on and off a few times before deciding being married to a handy man like Eric means I don’t have to do crap like that. So then I sat down and waited for him.

Once he got home I asked him to check it out.

And sure enough not only had our cable, that used to rain like manna from heaven, been disconnected, it had been CUT. SNIP SNIP.

WHY OF ALL DAYS DID THEY CHOOSE THE DAY THAT I ACTUALLY REMEMBERED I WANTED TO WATCH MY FAVORITE SHOW!?

I was devastated. And to make matters worse, no one around me has cable either. WHAT’S THE DEAL?

Some might say, “Just watch it online.” But I can’t watch it online, because you can only watch it on CW’s page, and it really really sucks and skips, and pauses and it’s full of the same ad over and OVER. And if I have to watch one more ad for Cervical Cancer I’m going to remove my own cevix with my bare hands. Yeah, I’m that annoyed with them. I don’t mean to be insensitive to the problem, I’ve written an awareness campaign. I know it’s serious. I just can’t watch the same asinine commercial ad infinitum.

Anyway. I think cable might be like a dishwasher. It’s one of those things that you’re fine if you don’t have, but once you do have it, you realize how much more fun life can be.

So now I can’t decide what to do. I’ve narrowed it down to two options.

1. Just get over it and never find out who will be America’s Next Top Model, Chopped Champion, or Project Runway Star…

or

2. Not only get cable but get a damn DVR as well.

I think I’m pretty productive. And I don’t totally think television is a good thing. But at the same time…I think Tim Gunn is a wonderful thing. So it’s hard to reconcile that.

I feel like everyone I ask about this doesn’t have cable. And I feel like that’s not normal. So cast your cable vote now…or forever hold your peace.

Until then I will continue checking the CW website for the new episode of ANTM…scalpel in hand.

xoxo

Alison

15 Comments

  1. Breanne King

    hey we have cable….dvr….the whole deal. i think DVR is like the dishwasher thing…can't live without it anymore! Come over if you ever need a tv fix

  2. Julia

    Get an antenna! It's TV and it's FREE!!!

  3. mandy dominici

    ohhh, I thought you said "She's a cook." So kept waiting to see what delicious thing you made instead of watching cable. I miss ANTM/craft/girl-talk night.

  4. Crystal

    We get free cable through the university, but I do love all my many options.

    However, I kicked and screamed and fought and cried when Taylor tried to talk me in to Tivo… and now, because of me, we have a lifetime subscription. Oh, it is HEAVEN (especially when your husband hates your shows so you have to watch them during the day while he's gone.)

  5. Amanda

    My DVR is what saves me from insanity with a child. We can record his shows whenever they're on and avoid watching Dora at all costs and then I can watch what I want when he naps. Not that I only watch it when he naps… It's a good thing he doesn't pay attention to the tv when I watch my shows. Learning to "smize" before he learns how to jump could be embarrassing.

  6. Holley

    i am in the same boat… lame sauce! i do watch all my shows online though, and cw's website suggs. i catch my stuff at http://www.casttv.com. they are usually pretty good. they have antm and project runway etc etc. good luck!

  7. Chelsea

    three greatest inventions ever (in order):
    1. TiVo (this includes TV)
    2. iPhone
    3. Air Conditioning

    get cable, and the dvr and your life will be changed for the better.

  8. Liz

    I don't watch much tv either, but when I do want to watch tv, I don't want it to suck. So I'm all for cable.

    We haven't bought a DVR yet, but I think it could improve my life substantially. The only thing holding me back is that you have this list of things that you recorded and now watching all of them is yet another thing on your to-do list. And since I'm obsessive about making lists and crossing things off on them… I think it could be unhealthy for me.

  9. dana and justin

    obviously get cable AND dvr. Then, when we get back, you can cancel it!

  10. Emily Frame

    your time is more valuable then sitting through commercials online or on T.V.! DVR!!

  11. Jake and Jenna

    cable is worth it. dvr is even more worth it.

  12. Jendar

    go to hulu.com. they have everything there I think OR, just google your favorite shows and see if there is a website with the episodes. that is what I do with all my favorite shows like mad men, bored to death, united states of tara, etc…

  13. Scott Christopherson

    whitney is going to try and visit you this week.

  14. Ginny

    Oh I know what you mean. I love love love my cable and Colby hates watching TV and after we got married we lived off online and Netflix…but now I got cable and I have been addicted…and i look back longingly at the simplier times when I didn't have cable…

  15. Trevor

    Ditch the cable and dish. Download only the shows you want to watch, and after a couple of months you really won't miss it. I turned mine off a year ago and am not really missing out.

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