I have a few snotty opinions about certain things that I try to keep to myself. Mostly because I know that by sharing them the only thing I’d be doing is either pissing people off or making people feel stupid. And I don’t want to do either of those things.
I have a few opinions about Facebook, but I know to bring them up is to denounce literally EVERYONE in the world and not only their mother, but their grandmother. So instead of one of my usual diatribes, I’ll just say the reason I’m not on Facebook is because “I DON’T WANT TO KNOW.” Whatever it is you learn on Facebook, I don’t want to know. I personally feel that I can instead learn about whatever it is through a plethora of other mediums such as: phone, text, email, snail mail or GASP direct human contact. Do I miss out on party invites, requests and other updates? Yes, I do. But I also figure if you really like me you’ll send me a damn text.
But even though I don’t partake in Facebook, I can see the benefits and nice things about Facebook that have hooked so many. And it’s not like I don’t occasionally hop on a friends account to see a picture or two. I don’t think it’s inherently evil. Facebook will probably soon self-destruct anyway. But as for now, my brain just can’t handle the overload.
So even though I can get over Facebook, the one thing I cannot get over is Twitter.
Do you people Twitter? Do you Tweet? Are you a Tweeter?
I remember vaguely being introduced to Twitter years ago and thinking, “Who would ever do that!? This will never catch on.”
Unfortunately I was as wrong about Twitter never catching on as I was about overalls coming back in style. I’m still not ready to let go of my overalls and I’m still not ready to accept Twitter as a legit past time.
I participate in one of the most self-indulgent, narcissistic past-times a human can join in on (blogging) and I STILL can’t understand the appeal of twitter!
TO CONSTANTLY UPDATE PEOPLE WITH THE MUNDANE DETAILS OF YOUR EVERY MOVE? It’s just beyond me. Even if you’re a person who is as amazing as Johnny Depp, I still don’t see the value of following your every move.
One major reason I think Twitter has caught on is because it’s the one social medium that the baby boomers and 30+ crowd aren’t behind on. So they’ve latched onto it like it’s Botox in a bottle.
Do you know how many meetings I had to sit through at the Advertising Agency where I used to work and listen to my 50-something bosses talk about Twitter like they were in the know? We had informational meetings about Twitter. My 50ish year-old boss wrote an entire script with references to Tweeting for a client.
And you see it everywhere in the media now. Reality show judges, Radio DJ’s, basically all the old people still trying to make it in pop culture, reference their tweets with this sad sense of hipness.
I know a ton of celebrities and bloggers and even politicians tweet and I’m not even on Twitter, it’s info picked up from references. But are you wonderful salt-of-the-earth people tweeting? Or following these tweets? Is it really that interesting? Do you think it’s useful? I’m ready to hear someone defend Twitter or tell me the utility of it, because I’m continouslly baffled.
Everyone is allowed their indulgences, their guilty pleasures. I’m not claiming I only watch the History Channel and read the classics.
But Twitter? Come on. I feel like it’s just one more way to establish a false sense of intimacy. And this false sense of knowing others, of being connected to them through superficial carefully scripted blurbs just enables us to become more detached and misdirected.
Then again, maybe I’m just mad because a Tweet is like a teeny tiny, tiny blog post. And that just really pushes my buttons.
I think I’m turning into a cranky old lady. Maybe I should just put on my overalls and move to a ranch in Montana. But I sure as hell won’t be tweeting about it.
Alright. Tell me why I’m wrong.