She’s got the whole world in her backpocket

As a general rule I don’t follow current events, politics, or celebrity news. I like to live in a self-obsessed bubble where the only reality is the one I create…with my blog. It’s wonderful.

But…I married a politics loving news-starved man, who checks as many political blogs (SNORE) as I do crafty design blogs (CHEER!). And occasionally I cannot avoid the little tidbits of news he throws my way. This morning as I was heading out the door, my media addicted husband-glued to the small screen on his iPhone-yelled from the bedroom,

“The economy is up 3.3 percent!”

And I thought, “That’s funny, so is my ass.”

Now, don’t get me wrong, I care about the economy. I work in advertising, if the economy is down people cut marketing budgets and ultimately cut my job…I totally care. But, I’ll admit, I might, just maybe, care about the size of my butt more. Is that wrong? Anyway, I thought it was pretty cool the size of my backside could perhaps predict the GDP.

Interest now piqued by a direct correlation to my life, I read the news article once I got to work. Turns out the 3.3 percent increase happened in the Spring quarter…SAME AS MY BUTT.

“The Commerce Department reported Thursday that gross domestic product, or GDP, increased at a 3.3 percent annual rate in the April-June quarter. The revised reading was much better than the government’s initial estimate of a 1.9 percent pace and exceeded economists’ expectations for a 2.7 percent growth rate.”

Maybe I helped the economy by eating at Cafe Rio more? I know that contributed to the OTHER recent increase. Maybe I helped the economy by having to buy new jeans because I was eating at Cafe Rio more? Probably. No one can really tell for sure.

All we know is, Obama yo mama and McCain yucky cheeks, are both missing out on a very valuable secret weapon.

So I WAS thinking about trying to shed those much dreaded, “I was really skinny before my wedding then I got married and ate donuts” pounds…but now that I know I have such a direct effect on the free world, I might think twice about going to bed hungry.

Anyway, thanks for reading my blog. I love you. And so do your elected officials. Don’t forget to vote.


Your ba-donk-a-donk GDP predictor


  1. Matt and Jennae Porter

    Thanks for the good laugh today. If only my backside had shrunk as much as our investment portfolio has lately… =)

  2. Cindy

    I’m trying to be more politically aware and even bought a book about it. It helps me sleep at night. I think your hiney looks great!

  3. fraggLe+monkEy+shysteR

    how are you so funny?! and don’t worry- the best of us gain those happy marraige pounds. it’s a good thing.

  4. kimmy girl

    laughing out loud. reading outloud to roommates. really good work missy…you put the rest of us to shame!

  5. Andy J

    This is the first of your blogs I’ve read (Linked from Tammy’s), and it’s prrrrrrretty good. =)

    Keep up the good work! And keep eating at Cafe Rio for god sake!

    -Andy J
    (Your long lost Prom King)

  6. just*don't*think*about*it

    Yes, I was just wondering if you have noticed any part of your anatomy that might correspond to precious metals. I’m thinking about buying some silver. Any advice?
    Thank you kindly.

  7. Fish Nat!on

    I’d like to think there is a correlation between most things concerning our government and fat asses

  8. Patricia

    my philo. is more of you to love the better. eat an extra tortilla. do it for me.

  9. JenErik

    How do I love you, let me count the ways- 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, etc etc etc. Ali, you’re hilarious.

  10. marshall p

    you are the cutest girl. ever. I’m pretty sure you are “seriously, so blessed.” are you interested in being in a sewing club?

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