It’s a SNOOGLE!

Well hello, Monday.

In my opinion there’s only one way to start a Monday. And that’s with two breakfasts…CHECK…and a “Goodies by Ciara” Pandora radio station…DOUBLE CHECK.

I suggest you do the same. Because if one breakfast is good for you, imagine how healthy you’ll be if you eat two! In fact you could possibly LOSE weight. It hasn’t been working for me, but then again I do have a parasite the size of an orange.

Other than that the most exciting things happening in my life are the fact that Eric and I are getting sod for the backyard today! (And it’s a sad sad day when getting sod is actually a very thrilling event in your life.) And the fact that I ordered this for myself:


It’s a SNOOGLE! Have you seen/heard of these? I’m THRILLED about it. If you have any insight DO SHARE. But if it’s negative, keep it to your snotty little self. My SNOOGLE and I will be in love and we don’t want no haters.

Anyway. Enjoy your day!

Xoxo,

Alison

A Word About Cats.

Disclaimer: If you are a cat person and would still like to respect me as a human and be my friend…then you probably shouldn’t read this post. But just remember, even if I don’t love your cat, it doesn’t mean I don’t love you.

Cats and I have never, ever gotten along. We just don’t understand one another. I don’t like how they don’t really want you around, except to feed them, I don’t like how they make my eyes itch and tear up, and I especially don’t like their snotty little attitude. They don’t walk, they prance, they don’t eat, they nibble, and they certainly don’t love you, they’re just using you to clean up their poop.

This doesn’t mean I go around kicking stray cats or drowning kittens, I have a heart people! It does mean, however, that if you want to try to convince me why your cat is an exception and “not like other cats” (as all cat owners say)…well I don’t want to hear it. There’s a reason why things are called an “EXCEPTION,” and no matter how special you think your cat is, odds are, they probably aren’t one.

So back to cats. The other thing I really don’t like about them is that their owners let them wander around willy-nilly. (Yes Lea, I know Mike stays inside and I SINCERELY THANK YOU!) Anyway, I’d NEVER let my (hypothetical) dog wander through your yard and poop on your tulips. But people with cats let those things go wherever they please! Strutting around like sultans. Many mornings I see cat prints all over my car! The nerve.

Our next-door neighbors, though sweet as can be, happen to be cat people. And the problem with cat people, other than the fact they have been infected with cat saliva and have been chemically seduced by their felines, is that their cats attract OTHER cats. And those cats attract MORE cats, then before your know it, you feel like you’re living next door to Mr. Mistoffelees and his posse.

And if you think it’s not affecting my life. Well, you’re wrong! EXAMPLE: Eric left his hiking boots out on the porch. I was appreciative of this because who wants those muddy things in the house? One cold winter morning I pulled into the driveway after returning from the gym. I saw a cat perched on one of Eric’s boots. “What is that cat up to!?” I wondered. I decided to stay in the car and watch. After a few seconds the cat left, and when he hopped off the boot a little stream of steam wafted into the cold air.

That disgusting beast had peed in his shoe! Which means it had been peeing in his shoe for who knows how long!

Anyway, recently I’ve declared war on the cats because after gardening on Saturday, momentarily without gloves, (I FORGOT!! OK) I was POSTITIVE that I somehow contracted toxoplasmosis and that I had inadvertently caused my baby brain damage or worse. I became obsessed with this, just SURE that the place where I had planted all those pansies is the place where those evil cats might pee, and even though I washed my hands before eating that orange, it could have gotten under my fingernails!

Anyway. I then became convinced that the reason I’ve always disliked cats is because somehow subconsciously I knew that they were going to endanger my baby. And then I was positive that I shouldn’t be allowed to be a mother because I can’t even remember to wear gardening gloves. I like the feel of dirt!

However, after a hysterical break down, Eric did some research, we spoke to my midwife, and have concluded that a) that the cats would have to POOP there b) they don’t poop there, they poop by the back window c) the statistical odds that I don’t already have toxoplasmosis, plus the odds that I contracted it, plus the odds it would actually reach my baby, are well, quite quite slim.

BUT REGARDLESS. The mental anguish it has caused me has been horrendous. Enough so that Eric is now fed up with those cats, and he hates them as much as I do.

Which brings me to the BB Gun. Eric might have accidently picked one up last night and is positively giddy about it. Don’t worry, he promises not to shoot to kill or even shoot to maim, but just to scare. And even though I dislike cats A LOT, and they have possibly hurt my unborn child, I still don’t totally support it.

But at the same time. I’m not going to stop it.

So take that pussy cat.

I told you, you shouldn’t have read this if you love cats. Don’t judge me. I’m just one pregnant woman trying to make her way in this world.

Xoxo

Alison

She’s got a bone to pick with pregnancy.

Now that the cat is out of the bag, we can finally talk about all this pregnancy nonsense! I’ll apologize in advance to the male readers…but I’m thinking you’ll probably find some of this information useful in the future, and if not, well then just keep it in your pocket as a cautionary tale!

WTF people? How on earth are so many women pregnant? I don’t think I’ve really ever paid attention before to pregnancy, frankly it never interested me. So it seemed like all of the sudden I joined a club of clichés and romantic comedies. And this one thought has echoed over and over, as catchy as the Thong Song and even more repetitive: “HOW DO PEOPLE DO THIS MULTIPLE TIMES?!” And not only are they pregnant multiple times, they do it voluntarily. AND they do it while taking care of other children. HOW? WHY? It all seems so cruel.

Those little babies must really be worth it! Now don’t get me wrong, my first trimester was bad, no fun, yucky, awful, but it was nowhere near as bad as it could have been or as I have discovered other women’s can be. I wasn’t hospitalized because I couldn’t keep food down, in fact it all stayed down no matter how badly I prayed for it to come up (yes I’m serious I prayed multiple times to chuck), and now that I’m almost 15 weeks it’s I’m starting to feel A LOT better. I never had to vomit (or worse) publically and I’ve only passed out once (so far). Some women feel sick the whole time! They deserve medals.

Also while I’m ranting, I think it’s important I publically address the misnomer “Morning Sickness.” Eric was sincerely confused when I felt as if I was going to hurl from the moment I woke up until the second I went to bed. And sometimes in the middle of the night. And not only do you feel sick, you feel like a lazy slob because the only thing you have enough energy to do is push the “next” button on your Netflix screen so another episode of Friday Night Lights plays. (I LOVE YOU TIM RIGGINS!)

Add all of this to the fact that some women are able to keep all this DRAMA to themselves for the first 12+ weeks, and pregnancy just continues to BOGGLE the mind. How can you feel like that, at work, at the (GAG) supermarket, when out with friends, with family, and NOT tell them about it? But I think the ability to NOT tell people things will always to elude me no matter what the circumstances.

Anyway. Like I said. I’m feeling so much better. I can open my refrigerator without wanting to cry, eat something other than Gyros and fast food, and I don’t even have to take afternoon naps anymore. But I just want to give a GREAT BIG shout out to all you moms. You astound me. And also, almost none of you blog about the negative parts. Don’t worry, I’ll do it for you so no one else is fooled!

However, other than all of the physical maladies, mentally and emotionally all those hormones must have evened me out. I think (others might disagree) that I’ve been a very reasonable pregnant lady. And I only recall one freak out, when my sister told me I was, “overreacting” to a certain situation. And as we all know, the worst thing you can say to someone who IS overreacting, is that they are overreacting.

Anyway. I have so much more to say on the matter. And it probably all falls into the mushy miracle of life category. And I’ll try to spare you. But it’s my blog and it’s your fault for reading.

Also, thank you so much for all the sweet words and congratulations. I’d write more, like how each and every comment meant so much to me, but if I do I’ll start crying.

But. I love you all. I’m so horribly happy that I if I pause too long to reflect I’ll just melt into a puddle. Life man, it’s CRAZY! Now I’m going to listen to Usher’s new song OMG, because obviously the baby will have to take after its mother in the dirty dancing skills department.

Xoxo,

Alison

The Tiny Bunny Finger Puppet Tutorial

Hello! This is a step-by-step tutorial to make a Tiny Bunny Finger Puppet! This is what your completed bunny could look like! Awesome book picture by Heather.

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HERE’S THE FREE TEMPLATE

Materials needed for one finger puppet:

-ONE FREE TEMPLATE
- ONE 5×4” piece of felt in your color choice
- ONE 2×2.5” piece of white felt
- ONE 5mm black pom pom
- ONE 1/2” white pom pom
- white embroidery thread (I use perle #8)
- black embroidery thread
- sewing machine or hot glue gun

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I made all of my bunnies using my sewing machine and hand stitching. However, if you don’t have a machine or are afraid of needles…the whole bunny could be assembled with a hot glue gun.

Step 1 Cut out your pieces!

Download and print the Hoppy Easter Finger Puppet template. Cut out the pattern pieces. Next, pin the pattern pieces to the colored felt and cut 2 bodies and 2 ears. You’ll also cut 2 ears from the white felt.

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Step 2 Make the bunny’s face

Attach the black pom pom to the front body piece using black embroidery thread. I did this by making one stitch through the center of the pom pom. You could also attach the nose with a hot glue gun, though it might not be as secure. Next, make your bunny’s eyes. I used my black embroidery thread and made two French knots (one for each eye). Alternately, you could make two small x’s. You will add the whiskers later!

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Here’s a French Knot refresher in pictures, but if you’re new to them (these can be tricky) go here: QUICK FRENCH KNOT TUTORIAL

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Step 3 Attach the bunny’s tail

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Attach the bunny’s tail to the back body piece by making a stitch through the white pom pom with the white embroidery floss. Again, a hot glue gun would also work. But I might not trust it in a baby’s mouth!

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Step 4 Make those floppy ears!

Place one white ear on top of one colored ear. Sew the two ear pieces together carefully and slowly with a 1/8” seam allowance—backstitching at each end. Repeat this for the second ear.

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*These ears are tiny and can be tricky to sew! I found it helpful once I reached the tip of the ear to put my needle in the down position, lift my foot (see above) and then rotate the ear little by little to maneuver the curve. Make sure to lower your foot again before each stitch! The bottom of the ear gets tucked in side the bunny so don’t get stressed out about that. But if they are really giving you a hard time bust out that glue gun!

Step 5 Make the bunny’s body!

Sandwich the ears between the front and back body pieces WRONG sides together. The whites of the ears should face the front. Wiggle the ears around until you like the positioning, and then pin them in place. This should secure all three pieces (the ear and both body pieces) together.

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Next determine how big you’d like the finger opening to be! Will these be for tiny fingers, big fingers, or both? Place the finger (or something similar in size) on the bottom of the bunny and mark on either side of it generously (so the circumference of the finger will fit) with a fabric marker or pins.

Sew the front and back pieces together with a 1/8” seam allowance—starting and stopping where indicated by markings you made around the finger. Make sure to backstitch at each end and take out the pins! You’ll also want to make sure your tail is facing you as you sew. Again, this is intricate sewing, so you could hand stitch it, or use the glue gun. But keep in mind, you can trim off whatever you screw up!

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Step 6 Add the whiskers

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Cut two 3” pieces of white embroidery floss. Make the first set of whiskers by looping one piece of floss around the bottom of the nose and tying a knot snug against the base of the top of the pom pom. Loop the second piece of floss around the TOP of the nose and knot it snug against the base of the bottom of the pom pom. Trim the whiskers to your desired length!

Your finger puppet is now complete! Don’t forget to share your pictures here!

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Enjoy some intimate moments together.

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p.s. If you’re looking for something more substantial for your Easter basket the Peek-a-boo Bunny Pattern in my shop is a PDF that I email to you! It’s a super quick project and you could make a bunch in time for Easter!

The Peek-a-boo Bunny!

xoxo

Hoppy Easter from The Little Tiny!

She has an announcement.

This also counts as, what I think is, a VERY good excuse for my lack of posting.


That’s right. I’ve got a bun in the oven! This is longest cake I’ve ever baked! I’m 13 weeks along.

We’re pretty excited. And so is the new Greek place in Provo. Where I now spend a majority of my time.

xoxo

The Birds

Keep it crafty, Keep it sassy.