You’re gonna love this! When you need validation, comfort, strength, or support, do you go to OUTSIDE sources? We’re talking about why it’s better to look IN first, and sharing 5 ideas on how to do that. Prepare to get aware!
And if you’re a visual person like me, here are the 5’s I share in the episode:
5 S’s for coping with suckiness OR 5 S’s for going IN rather than going OUT
When you start to feel anxiety, sadness, anger, frustration, a sense of failure, instead of going OUT, and gossiping, or watching TV or texting others to vent and/or validate, first go IN and do these things! I swear on my life you’re gonna feel better in the long run. And we discuss each of these more in the podcast!
- STOP and catch the feeling! Instead of letting it manifest itself as a blow up, harsh words, anxiety, or whatever your emotional habit is, STOP and watch it, observe it SEPARATE yourself from it.
- SOURCE it – where is this fear, or reaction really stemming from? What could your emotions really be about, rather than what you’re attributing them to? Don’t blame others, don’t judge yourself for whatever the feeling is stemming from, just SOURCE it.
- Sit with it – experience it. Sit in that negative feeling rather than hiding from it. I noticed I grab my phone when I feel uncomfortable, and I know this is to bury the feeling. But I find having the feeling is often not as bad as we think it is. It’s not FUN, but it’s better than it festering beneath the surface for weeks, months or years.
- Say it or write it – have a conversation with the feeling. Here’s the quote I shared on the podcast: “Dr. James Pennebaker, author of Writing to Heal has seen improved immune function in participants of writing exercises. Stress often comes from emotional blockages, and overthinking hypotheticals. He explains, “When we translate an experience into language we essentially make the experience graspable.” And in doing so, you free yourself from mentally being tangled in traumas. Studies have also shown that the emotional release from journaling lowers anxiety, stress, and induces better sleep.” QUOTE SOURCE
- Surrender – Suffering is when our life expectations and life circumstances do not match up. You can ALWAYS change one, but rarely you can change both. The Buddah defines enlightenment as the absence of suffering. So, in order to be at peace with ourselves, we have to surrender our expectations or surrender TO our circumstances, depending on what you have control of. So decide if you can change your circumstance or expectations, then change what you can and surrender to what you can’t.
I’d LOVE to hear your thoughts on this, or if you try these, or have other ways of managing suckiness in your life! HAHA!
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I’m Still Standing by Elton John
10 Surprising Benefits You’ll Get From Keeping a Journal, Huffington Post Article
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