I can bake you cookies, but I can’t make a dentist appointment.
It really has only been in the past couple of years that I’ve realized that one reason I’m able to get “so much” (whatever that means, it’s all relative) done, is because I basically don’t function like an adult.
I’ve been pretty open about my non-cleaning habits, and thankfully have hired help, and tried to get more organized, but it goes so much deeper than that. I’ve been getting a lot done in some areas of life, because I’ve been completely neglecting others.
Like a little kid who just wants to play play play, since graduating from college, I’ve just increasingly indulged my creative side–the side that makes products, creates content, plans parties and sprints from project to project–to a point where I think I became almost handicapped at completing responsible, routine, or necessary activities. Then I added in some kids, so you know, I take care of them, THEN sprint from project to project. So this means I’ve pretty much neglected things like: periodically organizing the cupboards, making doctors appointments, sleep, or taking time to figure out systems to help make housework, living, or doing most anything better/easier/more functional.
Now let’s get real, we all have our problems and we all love our problems to an extent, right? By allowing myself to be SUPER creative and create create create, I get to KEEP CREATING. I don’t have to stop and do the boring stuff. I also get to walk around going, “Oh! Look at me, I’m so CRAZY! WEEEE!” Which is kind of fun, right? And then not fun when I’m sobbing hysterically in a huge mess stressed out and unsure of how to dig myself out. But STILL if you look deeper, it’s a way of getting attention and allowing myself to act irresponsibly.
Like lots of little kids, if Ginger (my 4-year-old) is playing and super interested in something, she cannot be bothered to use the bathroom.
So when I think about it in those terms, I’ve essentially just been peeing my pants instead of stopping to use the bathroom. I’ve kind of allowed myself to act like a kid, for the past however many years. I’m playing playing playing. But as play is the work of children, my play is my work. And my work is SOCIAL MEDIA YA’LL! So instead of getting scolded I’ve been applauded, congratulated and encouraged to keep going because, well I’m working so hard! Look how much I’m getting done! I’m doing it…WEEEE!
See even though I get so frustrated when Ginger does it, I totally get why little kids pee their pants. Hell, I’m tempted to do it instead of bothering to use the bathroom sometimes. Because I mean if you pee your pants you get to keep doing what you’re doing without interruption. You don’t have to stop, find a bathroom, fuss with a zipper, wash your hands. All that crap. And if you’re 4, you don’t really care too much if people see your wet stain. So there’s hardly any reason not to.
But I keep teaching my child to use the potty because you know, I feel some sort of motherly duty to help her not smell like urine. And Ginger acquiesces because I threaten to take away her favorite stuffed animal friends or I bribe her with treats for clean pants.
So now that I know I’m like a pants-wetting-toddler, I’m trying to do a little better. This week my goals have been to get to bed before midnight, which for me is almost impossible, and to wake up at 7 and exercise. It’s Tuesday and I’m 2 for 2 guys! These seem like simple things, but I noticed yesterday that after my run I emptied the dishwasher, filled it, cleared a counter that has been cluttered for 2 weeks, and made a nutritious breakfast. HOLY CRAP WHO AM I?!
Haha. I guess I share because I think the tendency of most adults, especially most moms, is to do the opposite of what I’ve been doing. I’m not saying that I’m so special and different, but from what I gather based on conversations with other women is that the more common problem is NOT stopping to create, not stopping to give yourself what you need or what your want, and NOT stopping to make time for your goals, or just some alone time. It’s the same problem, we just had different priorities.
So I mean, really, if you think about it, you’re probably metaphorically peeing your pants too. HAHAHAHA. How embarrassing for you. No I’m kidding. I’m just saying that as I get older, wise ol 31 over here, I just keep seeing what a good idea balance is. I don’t think I’ll ever fully embrace balance, because frankly I don’t want to. I like being a bit crazy. It’s my MO and and I like it. But I do think it’s a good idea to stop smelling like hypothetical urine.
So I’ll let you know how my goals are going, let me know how yours are going.
Here’s to a happy week, living your dreams, and dry pants.